A letter of apology to Bangladeshi citizens

Dear Citizens of Bangladesh,

I am truly, deeply sorry for the outrageous behavior on our part in arresting your fellow citizens for having sex. I'm sorry that human nature is a crime in my country.

I understand that after toiling at work for days at a time people could use some time off to have some sex. And we should respect that. Everybody needs some form of stress release. But it's not my fault that all forms of healthy stress release are considered criminal in my country.

Please don't blame people like me. I couldn't have done anything. I could be arrested and flogged for the same "crimes."

I can only watch as your people are taken away in handcuffs, locked up and berated, for the crimes of loving one another and building our country's infrastructure.

I cannot express in words how truly sorry I am for the stupidity of my people.

If I may be so selfish, I implore you to please imagine what we must go through.

You would not expect such callousness from your own government, but to us, who are cursed to be born into this wretched "paradise," this is everyday life.

This is just who we are. We oppress others, and repress ourselves. We have this twisted notion that, because we are an unhappy bunch of people, everybody else should be just as unhappy as ourselves. People won't admit to this, but it's true. You can see it in our actions and rhetoric.

We don't take kindly to strangers when they come into our land with their "human rights" and "other religions." No. I'm very sorry that my countrymen and women do not respect individual liberties and privacy.

If we were to respect human rights that would require us to accept a lot of things that we don't want to accept, like nature, and reality.

We are experts at deluding ourselves. I'm so sorry for that, and I hope you will forgive me.

Sincerely,
Canofworms